Are You Thriving or Just Surviving? How to Increase Your Happiness, Wellbeing and Success

There are literally hundreds of ways to describe diverse mental states and the related quality of life that they lead to. One of the most frequently used in mindtraining is Surviving to Thriving which comprises four states (surviving, coping, coasting and thriving). Surviving to Thriving is based on a rationale that groups important components of human behaviour into four archetype mindsets. Between them, these states represent distinct human ways of living, ranging from the least productive (surviving) to the most beneficial (thriving). By observing and understanding our own behaviours we can work out what our own mindset is. It then becomes possible to change how we think and act to improve our quality of life.

In most cases, applying the principles of mindtraining will allow you to understand how mental states are generated and maintained. A fuller explanation of the Surviving to Thriving process can be found here. But a brief description of the elements that make up of the four states is published below. However, it is important to remember that both the behaviours and the related mindsets are generalisations.

If you’d like to evaluate your own mental state, reflect on these statements below linked to mindset characteristics. The extent of your agreement with each of the statements will help reveal the relationship between your current mindset and your quality of life.

Mindtraining Mental State	Characteristics
Thriving	Life – I have a sense of purpose and direction. I enjoy and find relevant most of the things I am involved with. Health – I am generally well and have a positive attitude to overcoming sickness. Orientation – I am grounded in the present but see a continuity with the past. Boundaries – I successfully mange to balance my needs with those of the others. Future – My life is progressing in the right direction, I have created a meaningful trajectory. Relationships – I feel connected to and valued by individuals and communities. Mental Surplus – I’m confident that I will reach my goals and fulfill my potential. Agency – I am able to make choices about the important issues in my life. Resilience – I can generally deal with difficult situations and overcome setbacks. I learn from my mistakes. Validation – I am confident in my own abilities and I praise others when appropriate.
Coasting	Life – I have a sense of purpose but sometimes I’m happy to go with flow. Health – My health is better than many that of many others. Orientation – I’ve progressed further than many of the people I know. Boundaries – I manage my own needs and help others but I sometimes find achieving a balance difficult. Future – I could do more with my life but I’m better off than many. Relationships – I have many friends and colleagues but sometimes feel something is missing. Mental Surplus – I’m successful in some ways but I’m sometimes unsure about the future. Agency – I have a lot of freedom and choice in day to day affairs but still sometimes feel like a cog in a machine. Resilience – I can cope with most challenges but sometimes feel I’m running uphill. Validation – I try to be positive but often feel I’m not as capable as those around me. I want to reduce self-criticism.
Coping	Life – I often lack a sense of purpose and direction. I know I want change but I don’t know what to do about it. Health – I have a number of health issues which I don’t seem able to shake off. Orientation – I feel l could do much better in life, but I try to make the best of things. Boundaries – I sometime have to go the extra mile to be accepted. Future – I have aspirations, but I do very little to fulfill them. I find reaching my potential difficult. I have a sense that I’m losing my way. Relationships – I have some friends, but I often fail to maintain relationships. I often feel like an ‘outsider’. Mental Surplus – I need most of my energy to just keep going. I often ‘waste’ my potential. Agency – I find myself doing things I don’t want to. I find it hard to establish boundaries. Resilience – I often use a lot of energy just to stay on track. Validation – I try to be positive but often feel I’m not as capable as those around me. I want to stop criticising myself.
Surviving	Life – I lack a sense of purpose and direction. Health – I’m often ill, and invest little time or energy into my health. Orientation – I am not enjoying my life and don’t know how I got here. Boundaries – I often get pulled out of shape by others and sometimes find it hard to say no. Future – I don’t see how I can progress in my life, I just have to keep going. Relationships – I often feel socially isolated and social interactions often feel meaningless. Mental Surplus – I’m frequently exhausted by just surviving. I rarely have the energy to plan for the future, and feel like I’m on an unsuccessful treadmill. Agency – I feel almost no sense of control over my future, I just keep going. I rarely have meaningful choices in my life. Resilience – Even small problems can knock me out of my stride and sap my energy. Validation – I often experience self-doubt and lack confidence. Even minor criticisms can be difficult to deal with. I take small criticisms and ‘throw away’ comments to heart.